Faith is believing that out of your darkest times comes the brightest times. I know that to be true because that's all I had to hold onto in the beginning, before I got clean. There must be a reason for all this madness, there had to be. I know that in the deepest, darkest pit of my addiction I had a tiny glimmer of hope. That's why I stayed alive. That's why I fought my way back into the light. I had nothing left to lose.
I knew I was meant to be more than a junkie, a junkie that was close to death. I will never forget that empty feeling. The feeling of despair. But I will also never let go of the hope I have discovered and cultivated throughout this journey so far. I feel a great transition coming into my life and I know it has to do with my spirituality. I feel a shift in my heart. I am learning that I am nothing, I am everything. We are all connected. We are one. We need to grab onto each other. We need to love each other.
Hate is too great a burden. But I also know that true, unconditional love for others cannot come if there is no self respect and unconditional love for ourselves. So, do yourself a favor, learn to love yourself. Quit being so hard on yourself. You are exactly where you need to be. But just keep moving, keep progressing and I promise you it will be beautiful.
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